Thinking about the beginning

Baby #2's little tiny feet!

 As I'm moving further into being pregnant with my second little one, I can't help but think about the beginning days with my dear wonderful EG.  Both the trauma and the wonder of it all.

I don't think I've told my whole birth story anywhere in writing, but it was a little hairy.  Everything was fine and dandy (well, at least it was moving along okay) until just after EG was born.  At 2:50pm EG entered this world- bushy hair of head first.  Around 3:00pm the midwife was pulling on my placenta cord and it detached from the placenta- which was still firmly in place inside of me.  So, she went in after it.  Mind you, I didn't really pay that much attention to all of this.  Despite my goals of a natural birth, I ended up having an epidural around 7am that morning.  (something I will NOT be repeating again!)

Sometime after the midwife left and I told my husband I felt like a crime scene... yup- covered in blood and just so totally disgusting.  I got cleaned up and we moved over to the maternity ward.  What happened next is where things get a little traumatic.  Throughout the night I continued to bleed.  Not just a little, a lot.

When they took my blood in the morning at 6am my hemoglobin was at a 7.  Later at 9am it was at a 4.  So, in came the doctor with bags of blood to transfuse into me.  It took until noon to have the blood delivered.   In the meantime, I'm woozy, dizzy, and can't even hold EG let alone feed her because I'm not stable enough to hold my daughter.  Come 3pm and I'm sitting on the toilet when another gush of blood comes out.  5pm I'm rushed to surgery for a D&C.  By 8pm I'm back in my room- totally wiped.

The next morning I'm transferred to the intensive cardio wing because I'm having bad reactions to the blood.  EG can't come with me so every 3 hours I'm allowed 15 minutes to be with my new daughter.  Around 3am they decide that she's not doing well, so into the NICU she goes.  What a traumatic time it was.

Of course, then finally on Monday morning we drove home.  What a lovely time that was.  Being at home with EG.  Finally being able to feel like a family and just be together.  His parents came to the house about an hour or so after we got there, helped get dinner together and just check in and make sure we transitioned okay.  But being home, I remember being amazed.

EG and I had a rough start with breastfeeding, taking until the following Wednesday to really get things figured out.  Add to that her Jaundice, and it was a difficult first few days.  But still, amazing to be at home, to see her tiny toes.

What do we do with two kids?  How can I enjoy that immediate bonding and amazing time with our new child with EG there?  Thoughts?  How did you bring home baby #2?